So this week I realized that Austin has really started to feel like home. I only use Google maps about once a week now and I can easily get to and from most places without using my whole brain. I also have a routine that gets me out of my apartment every day. I work at a Boys and Girls Club at a middle school about 5 miles from me. It's a pretty great job. I coordinate art activities for the after school program. This means that every day I'm doing something with markers or colored paper. The down side, like all of the nonprofit work I've been involved with in the past, is that it doesn't pay much. I only work part-time and I make just enough to pay rent and utilities every month.
I don't expect I'll ever make a lot of money. I also recognize that this is completely my fault. When I changed my major to English, went to graduate school for Humanities, and set my sights on jobs related to youth and education I pretty much signed my life away to the clearance rack and used cars. All of that said, I know myself. I know that I would rather make my case for the measly job that helps people than the fancy job that bought me a Wii. Is it liberal guilt? Am I in love with being a martyr? Does my snobbery give me an excuse to underachieve? Probably. But I feel good about helping people and I don't like dressing up. I am still looking for full-time work, but I recognize now that it may take a while. I admit to applying for stiff business-casual jobs the past few months, but I've always been a little relieved when I didn't get them. I'm picky, but I'm hoping that means that eventually I'll be very, very happy.
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2 comments:
I completely love that you wrote this. I admit that I find myself struggling with this paradigm as well, but am not yet comfortable enough with it. I'm not sure I'll ever have figured it out. Mad props to owning this. It only speaks even more to your great character.
I think you either can work a job you love, which makes absolutely no money, or you work a job you're just ok with (or hate) but earn a good income.
Although, I sometimes wish we made more money, so we could do more traveling. One day...we can visit Texas!!!
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